Today is Monday, April 12th, 2010…

Good morning all and welcome to another work week!

I have yet to lower the amount of blood in my caffeine system enough, so I am a little slow this morning. It’s a gorgeous day in DC!

I have a good excuse for not flying today and tomorrow. There’s no general aviation flights allowed in the area around DC because of the big nuclear (nucular, for those of you who prefer the non-standard pronunciation) summit going on here. So the entire flight school is grounded ’till Wednesday.

Here’s my list of how the detonation of a suitcase nuke in DC and the subsequent radiation of free nuclear energy in the atmosphere would affect my day:

1. Coffee warmed by sitting it on the windowsill.
2. No need for the itty bitty book light any more, since everything will glow in the dark.
3. Save money on spaying and neutering pets because the radiation would render them sterile.
4. Reruns of “The China Syndrome,” “The Day After,” and “Jericho” would return to favor.
5. Determine once and for all if those fucking cockroaches would survive in the post apocalyptic world.
6. Everyone has male pattern baldness.

Enjoy the day!

Today is Thursday, April 8th, 2010…

Today is remarkable for one immediate reason: Oak trees.

The oak trees are spewing forth their pollen by the tons and the telltale yellow powder is everywhere in these here parts. Yes, folks, it’s hay fever season once again.

Here are a few things you can do during hay fever season:

1. Sneeze.
2. Sneeze.
3. Rub your itchy eyes.
4. Rub your itchy eyes while you are sneezing.
5. Poke yourself in the eye because you sneezed while you were rubbing your eyes.
6. Wear an eye patch.
7. Wait patiently for “Talk Like a Pirate Day” to come around again.

Enjoy the day.