If you’re not a Star Trek fan, these won’t be nearly as funny.

There I was sitting on the…

Well, never mind where I was and what I was doing at the time. That’s not important now.

Here’s my list of the top ten ways a rabid Star Trek fan could say they were on their way to the can.

1. Vent some drive plasma.
2. Eject the ol’ warp core.
3. Dropping some friends off at the Holodeck.
4. Do an emergency beam out.
5. Coolant leak.
6. Preventing a warp core breach.
7. Emergency separation.
8. Perform the Corbomite Maneuver.
9. I’m heading to the Battle Bridge.
10. Losing antimatter containment.

Qapla’